


Don't Speak

by shadowolfhunter



Category: Grimm (TV)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Laufer, M/M, Memory Loss, Zaubertrank, spells
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-10 04:37:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4377455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowolfhunter/pseuds/shadowolfhunter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sean Renard and Nick Burkhardt have gotten over themselves and have been happily in a relationship for three months. It's mostly secret still, and when Nick is seriously hurt taking down a human suspect, Sean can't wait by his bedside, they haven't gone public.</p><p>Juliette is not dead. Jack is back. And hell is about to be unleashed.</p><p>After everything that Sean has been through, he struggles to keep his composure. But the Captain may not be as alone as he thinks. Rosalee Calvert steps up to the plate. The Captain helped save her Monroe, and Rosalee knows he is not as black as he has been painted. Can she save the love of Sean's life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Speak

They’ve been dating for three months now. No one knows. Up until today keeping their relationship a secret from everyone, including Nick’s best buddies, has been simple.

Except today Nick’s received a serious bang on the head, in a take-down involving a large, vicious, drunk, HUMAN suspect, he’s out cold, and Sean is actually trying to appear normal.

He’s half-zauberbiest royal bastard prince. He literally has no real clue what normal is.

Normal in this case is a struggle, because where Sean Renard had concern for his officer before, now he and Nick Burkhardt’s relationship has moved to the point of _cuddling and buying things_ as Mia so delightfully phrases it, Sean is beside himself with worry. And he can’t really show it, but Wu is giving him sidelong looks like he knows something and Sean almost wants to ask, but dare not just in case he gives them away if Wu doesn’t know.

Keeping all of this straight in his head is giving Sean a headache.

They have talked it over, Sean wants to say something, he wants Nick to move into his large, empty, rather sterile and loveless house, because dammit Nick’s place has been virtually wrecked on at least six separate occasions, both Nick and Sean have shed a considerable volume of blood on its wooden floors. People have died in there.

Sean tries not to think about that, because it hurts. A lot. More than he ever suspected he would grieve for a Grimm. But she was Nick’s mother, and she died protecting Sean’s child.

Sean’s been trying to hold that grieving inside. Because grieving for Nick’s mother is a little bit strange, and seems disrespectful to Nick’s own grief.

Then there is the added complication of Adalind. And Nick’s baby.

Then there’s Juliette’s apparent death, and his own possession. Sean still aches with the realization of the things he did while possessed.

But his Nicky is lying in a hospital bed, unconscious, and Sean just wants to storm in there, and keep vigil by his true love’s bedside, but he can’t because Nick does not want or need his career ruined by overt emotional displays that he’s not awake to agree to.

So Sean is hurting. A lot. He’s trying to hold it together, because he really doesn’t want to lose control. He’s fairly sure he’s unsuccessful.

[][][][][]

Wu is not a fool. The nurse told him that the Captain was Nick’s emergency contact, which might have been that Nick is now orphaned and he doesn’t have any one else, or it could be that Nick and the Captain have finally stopped staring at each other like a starving man can stare at a slice of cheesecake and decided to do something about the backwash of hormones that Wu swears are circling the office.

The look of agony on the Captain’s face as he walked out told Wu everything he needed to know about the Captain’s feelings. Which was kind of strange because Sean Renard had one of the most impressive poker faces Wu had ever seen.

But the Captain’s been more demonstrative ever since they saved him from Jack. All his smooth, cultured shields seem to have been blown wide open. The Captain is basically a hot mess right now, and people are concerned.

The trouble is, the one who isn’t concerned is the Captain’s boyfriend.

Wu knows that Nick has been to hell and back. He’s been dragged under by his mother’s murder at cousin Kenneth’s hands, Juliette’s apparent death at Trubel’s hands, then Juliette turning out to be not so dead, well that was a whole new hell.

Through it all, Sean, and Hank, Monroe and Wu, have held on to Nick tight; and damn it’s been tough.

Wu’s never said it to the others, and he’ll never say it to his boss, or to Nick, but it’s clear the Captain is all the way in. Nick Burkhardt, Wu isn’t quite so sure of.

[][][][][]

He can’t be at Nick’s bedside for more than the normal time he would spend with one of his fallen officers, so Sean’s at the office. He’s buried himself in paperwork. Making out requisition forms, signing off on reports, re-organising his filing, his in-tray, getting around to all those stupid little paperwork tasks that he’s kept for a rainy day.

When he finally lays his pen down and gets to his feet to stretch out his back, and go in search of a decent cup of coffee, he notes with a snort that it is actually raining.

He knows they will call him when Nick comes round. He is Nick’s next of kin, afterall.

He stares moodily out of the window, the weather outside more than matching his depressed mood.

He loves Nick, he really does. For years Sean Renard had doubted his ability to love anything or anyone, he barely had a nodding acquaintance with love, growing up with a mostly indifferent father, whose wife decided that Sean and his mother should die, and his mother who he knew loved him, but raised him to be hardy and strong, and emotionally closed off. He would have continued to go through life not missing love, until a fledgling Grimm, with more courage than common sense, a very black and white sense of justice and a noble soul strayed into his life.

Up until a few months ago, Sean could even pretend to himself that he was unaffected by it all. He had one job, to aid the Laufer, to protect himself and his mother. Everything else in his life was filed in order of usefulness. He certainly did not have time for love. He was juggling too many plates.

Then somehow, Nick wound up in Sean’s bed.

There was nothing closed off about how they had come together. It was wild and passionate and so heart-stoppingly beautiful that Sean had realized what had been missing from his life.

He told Nick he loved him. Over and over again. And he knew that Nick loved him back. He’d just never said it to Sean.

[][][][][]

Jack was back, and quickly realized that his first host, Sean Renard while big and powerful, was not a suitable host for Jack’s genius.

His new host was much better. She even knew he was there, Sean Renard’s seed which Jack had borrowed, and this woman, Juliette, this powerful hexenbiest. Everything that Jack wanted he could have. She seemed amused by him.

He had a connection to the human world again, through her womb, so he knew what she was thinking, he could talk to her in a way that he had never been able to talk to Sean.

Juliette’s powers were without limits. She could manipulate people.

Like the nurse who walked into Nick Burkhardt’s room, and added a little special something to Nick’s iv line. 

Jack smiled, safe inside Juliette’s womb. Nothing wrong with a little revenge. Nick who had rejected her, and Sean who had replaced her in Nick’s affections. It didn’t matter that Sean had taken her in and tried to help her, that Nick still loved her, or that Sean had supplied the seed.

Revenge.

Jack chuckled. He was enjoying this ride.

[][][][][]

Rosalee and Monroe were visiting when Nick woke up, as it happened Hank and Wu were both there to check up on Hank’s partner, and Adalind had stopped by. She still needed Nick, and he had promised to stand by her. So there was a large audience when Sean finally made it back to his true love’s bedside.

He couldn’t help it, he was tired, wiped out with dealing with everything, and so overwhelmed with joy that his Nicky was awake, he took Nick’s hand and bent to kiss him.

Nick squirmed away. “Who are you?”

There was a moment of absolute stunned silence. Sean was convinced he heard a high sharp sound as the enormity of what Nick had just said broke like a tsunami over his head.

And perhaps that sound was the sound of his heart breaking, because Sean knew he had never experienced a pain like it. Not even being shot and dying hurt as much.

Well it wasn’t like this was something new, plenty of people had used him over the years, he was used to it. Practicing the iron self-control he exerted over other areas of his life, he excused himself with quiet dignity and left the room.

“Sean.” The voice was soft and gentle, and he fought a tiny battle with himself as he reached the elevator. Finally he turned. 

She had followed him, and when she stepped forward his arms went around her even though his only social cues at this point were confusion. He wasn’t used to this. He didn’t crumble when she put her arms around his neck and held him close, when her fingers gently rubbed the back of his neck and stroked into his short-cropped dark hair, but it was a pretty close run thing. Decades of cruelty and fleeing for his life were swept aside.

“Don’t give up, Sean.” Rosalee whispered in his ear.

And that was his undoing. He shivered, fought the massive lump in his throat, squeezed his eyes shut against the burning sensation, knew he lost what little control he deluded himself that he still had when a tear splashed down on her shoulder.

She pulled him away from the elevator doors, and guided him somewhere, he may have heard a door close behind them, but his tears had overtopped the barrier and couldn’t be contained.

Sean cried like he hadn’t since fleeing with his mother aged 13 and realizing that his collie would have to be left behind. That night he cried for his dog. Now he wept for his true love, broken and gone. He leaned into Rosalee’s shoulder and let go in a way he hadn’t done for almost thirty years.

Her hands stroked his neck, and gently rubbed his back in soothing motions while he gave into everything that had been building for quite a while.

He pulls himself together. Strangely he really can’t feel ashamed that he fell apart. Rosalee’s hand curves around his cheek, and he closes his eyes again, relishing the contact. Cherishing the friendship of this sweet, gentle, loyal fuchsbau who has never been anything but kind to him. A kindness Sean realizes he’s never really openly appreciated before.

“Thank you,” he says quietly when his voice is back under his command.

“You’re welcome.”

It goes without saying that she will not break his confidence, but that’s not to say that she won’t help him by any means necessary.

[][][][][]

After Rosalee lets Renard go, she goes back to the others. Wu has taken Adalind home, Hank and Monroe are still there. Conversation is slightly stilted, because the enormity of what they are facing, may just be too much.

Nick clearly remembers Hank and Wu, and Monroe. But he doesn’t remember Sean, and this time, Rosalee has her doubts about re-awakening that.

Sean is devastated, perhaps even more than Nick was when Juliette forgot him. They could go through all of that process again, After everything that both Nick and Sean have been through is it worth even trying to put them back together?

Rosalee had never seen the Captain come apart like that. She could feel his pain and sorrow, raw and tangible. If they tried and failed, how much more could he take?

It had occurred to Rosalee, that in the midst of her own happiness, and the gradual formation of the team that somehow Sean Renard had always been on the outside looking in.

He was strong and intelligent, she knew that, he’d been working for the Laufer since he was a teenager, which she knew from her brother, even when they worked together on some Laufer things she still didn’t really feel that she knew him.

He trusted her. He had shown that. She wondered if she had ever really shown him the same consideration.

Everyone was so hung up on the Keys, and the fact that Sean was a prince. A bastard one, but still a prince; they’d never looked beyond his Royal blood or his Wesen blood to the man beneath.

No man was an island, and as she watched Nick drift back to sleep, Rosalee quietly resolved to do what she could to help Sean Renard.


End file.
